Anger.

Anger is an emotion. I feel it sometimes. A lot of the time my anger is pointed at some abstract thing. It's kind of like I need something to be angry about all the time. If I stop being angry with the fact that people are killed and women are raped and that the world is broken, I find myself being angry with things closer to home: basketball, philosophy, particular people who are friends but who I disagree with, and who are distant enough for me to be angry at them and never be forced to resolve the problems, because I don't see them often enough to see the tangible, physical effects of a broken relationship - the harsh body language, the chill running up the spine, the hole in the chest.

The thing is, most of my anger is sustained by space between people. If we were closer together, we could do something about fixing the issues, even if our only motivation was that the issues had more tangible effect.

Today though, I was honestly angry, at someone who was standing beside me, and who I had to deal with that instant. I had just gotten to "The Seer's Tower" on Illinoise, and was enjoying it in my subconscious, when a security guard tapped me on the shoulder and woke me up, telling me to go take a nap in my dorm. Who the heck wakes someone who is enjoying a nap on a decent couch in the only quiet part of the school? Seriously.

My anger needs to be directed. I tell the team I coach that they need to direct their passion and energy into good defense and good offense. Somehow anger has to lead me to constructive action. Which seems a really dumb thing to say, since we're not talking about rage and fury here, just annoyance. But annoyance is probably an alright thing to harness too.

There, I did it. My annoyance was fuel for the first blog post on here in a few months. Great blog, eh?

Love, Ben